Yesterday, I was chatting with a friend of mine, whom I have secretly nicknamed the goddess of sex toys, for her extensive collection and knowledge. Actually, I think I am going to name her because she should take responsibility for showing me this horror. So you can all blame HOLLY from Woman Tribune for what you are about to see.
I love the supernatural, as you might well imagine given my other blog Fangs for the Fantasy, I spend quite a bit of time watching movies and television, as well as reading books about vampires, werewolves, ghosts, dystopian worlds and yes the ever popular zombie. As much time as I spend delving into speculative fiction, what I don’t do is fantasize about it. I am a big believer in your kink is not my kink and moving on, but sometimes you just have to pause and wonder what people are thinking.
Yes, that’s a zombie dildo and it’s made by Fleshlight (note: I’m linking for those who want to check it out. Totally wink wink nod nod) If you’re like me, you probably went what the hell.
Like many, I am a huge fan of The Walking Dead and I am really looking forward to World War Z coming out in the summer but isn’t a zombie er, dildo just a touch off? I mean, you are essentially pretending to play with a dead man’s junk. There’s macbre and then there’s just plain eww and in fact more eww. Does it come with that not so fresh rotting flesh smell? I suppose there’s some relief in not having to worry about becoming infected because of course, the junk does not have teeth or the ability to do anything other than scratch a particular itch. Saying the mantra of this kink is not my kink and it’s okay, but still major eww.
I have written before about the ability of my friends to send me the weirdest shit but this, this, I just don’t have the words for. Even after I scrubbed my eyes, I kept saying but why? Why did HOLLY even mention this? Is it because she’s weird, or is there something about my love of dystopian fantasy that hinted I might be totally into this? Either way, I’m totally scared now. I cannot unsee it and yes, the trauma has set in. As I said at the beginning of this post that my choice was to share this horror, now you can decide to do with it what you will, but at least I am not alone with the trauma.
Also, I totally blame Sparky because he started the trend by sending me fucking chicken in a can. It seemed to set off a tidal wave of people sending me the weirdest shit they could think of.