I spend quite a bit of time chatting with Sparky. He is very sweet, hilarious funny and very bright. For those who don’t know, Sparky is British. I have had the pleasure of speaking with him and I must say his accent is quite charming.
We were on gchat the other day when he used the phrase true that in a response to a comment I made. First off, the phrase is true dat, not true that. Seriously, what kind of Englishman uses the phrase true that? I was horrified. Of course, Sparky defended himself with the claim that his accent allowed him to use this phrase because it made anything sound charming.
I will agree that a true Englishman can almost make saying the word fuck sound charming but true that is a stretch at best. They also have very interesting way with words. Who doesn’t appreciate the term sod off? In fact, it can actually sound a little jolly if said in the right frame. I am not quite sure why calling someone a wanker is such a terrible thing because let’s face it, most people are going to get themselves some happy over the course of a lifetime.
Just when I decided to crack up his usage of the true that to a weird little eccentricity, he followed that by talking about wishing to give someone the side eye. I have to say that crosses some kind of barrier. Side eye? Really? I had to tell you, I was not feeling that one in the least. Englishmen preserver, they watch football and drink great beer but never and I do mean never do they say or give the side eye.
Then he offered me the final proof that he has some sort of disconnect with the whole Britannia thing….the man does not drink tea. How can you be British and not drink tea? That is like being Canadian and not believing in attack beavers. I’m sure that this has to be some sort of crime. He must be living in hiding or the local magistrate does not know of his high crime. Did I mention this NON TEA DRINKER then had the nerve to insult my habit of having a cup of green tea in the morning. Green tea is too tea.
Well I call shame on Sparky. He has officially ruined all of the ridiculous stereotypes that I had in my head regarding the British. How can I ever live the life of an ignorant anglophile again? Bad Sparky, bad Sparky.
If Sparky has ruined all of your illusions, let him have it in the comment section. I firmly believe that such behaviour must be controlled. Also, if there is something that you do that anti the stereotypes associated with your country of origin please share. Imagine, the idea of individuals running around the planet.